I was riding the bus on Thursday and decided to listen to sermon. My daily routine has become simply that…a routine. Get on bus A at 7:33. Wonder. Wait at a stop for 16 minutes. Wonder. Get on bus B. Wonder. Work. Wonder. Eat. Wonder. Stare at the ceiling. Wonder.
Wonder where God is.
Everyday wondering if this is the day I get freed.
I’d almost begun to stop wondering.
Then I listened to this message.
12 hours later…not only was I freed…but God showed me not only was he very aware of the last 17 months, but he’d been sitting with me on the bus that morning.
Some days life is just hard.
Why bother?
Would anyone notice?
Would anyone care?
Why try so hard?
Nothing’s ever gonna give.
We’ve all been there…even Superman.
In a pit of dispair towards the end of his life, Christopher Reeve ran out reasons to live. Apparently there was a discussion between he and his wife about “pulling the plug” and the Doctors told Mrs. Reeve that they would go along with whatever decision he made.
Not long after, a brash doctor with a thick accent entered the room. With little regard for Christopher’s condition, he motioned and yelled for him to “roll over.”
The needle slipped off the record…the crickets sounded off…mouths dropped…
The seemingly clueless Doctor continued…”Roll over.”
Christopher was bewildered and the moment got more awkward.
“Roll over.”
Christopher’s wife could not handle the insensitivity any longer, but before she could speak, the doctor ripped off his wig and threw off the curtain of a medical jacket to reveal Robin Williams.
The room filled with laughter.
Christopher put his and my pain in perspective…
“I can laugh…I can live.”
I can’t explain my pain.
I can’t justify yours.
But if a Superman who can no longer fly finds strength in laughter…so can I.
Laugh today…till IT’S what hurts.
One of my fondest memories is baking with my Nanny.
I can picture it like it was yesterday. She’d ask me what I wanted to make. When I shook my head, she’d say with a smile, “Part of the fun is choosing.” With that, she’d pull out her recipe box. Together, we’d look through the recipes. “MMM,” we’d say together. “That sounds good.”
When cancer invaded her life, she asked me, “What would you like to have to remember me by?”
Unlike picking what to bake, choosing was not fun, but it was easy.
I still have Nanny’s recipe box. There are days when I don’t bake, but pull it down out of the cupboard and open it up. I can almost hear her say, “Part of the fun is choosing.” I love looking through the recipes and remembering moments we shared together.
If I were to narrow it down to 1 Hobby, I would have to go with playing in my band – Hello Paisley.
I’ve been playing music with Benji for almost 4 years now (hard to believe). It used to be more of a mid-life crisis thing (go out and play rock star with the boys) but has now become more therapeutic than anything.
Having an outlet to express emotion is great for me these days, and for me, there’s nothing like cranking up an amp, turning on every pedal I can find, and hitting a D chord and feeling it in the chest. Makes me wanna cry and smile all at the same time.
A bit of “time” has elapsed between day 18 and 19 of this blog.
The irony about today’s post is that I’m supposed to be writing about a talent (something positive) and all it has done for me is exposed one of, if not my greatest, weakness. I have no confidence in who I am or what I’m good at.
So, after thinking about this for a few days and coming up blank, I decided to ask a few friends, “What’s my talent?”
A few single answers were: writing, creativity, style, humor, music, air guitar, quoting movies…but the one that I got more than one of was…
Connecting with people and speaking to their need.
My friends tried to explain what they meant. Apparently, I’m good at talking in such a way that people connect with, and am able to help them through that connection. To be honest, I would have put this down as my “passion.” To hear my friends say that was my greatest talent was surprising. Their check is in the mail.
The only wedding on my mind is the one that’s about 18 years or so away.
The most precious little girl God put on this planet will have chosen a man that treats her like the Princess she is.
He’ll make her laugh. Look at her like there’s only one woman in the room. He’ll hold her when she hurts and cheer when she wins. He’ll push her to be everything she dreams of being and he’ll believe in those dreams even when she doesn’t.
I’m not the Dad that doesn’t want her daughter to get married. I know she will. I just hope that when that day comes, I can know that my little girl is safe and in the hands of someone who loves her as much as I do.
I’m not sure if this is meant to be something that I’ve personally done, or something I appreciate. Since it’s my blog, I’ll share a sculpture that speaks to me.
Rather than tell you how it speaks to me, I’ll let you look at and think about how it speaks to you.
As pathetic as it sounds, there are lots of songs that make me cry. These days, a lot of them are sad songs.
But…there’s one that stands out above them all, and, it brings tears of joy, so we’ll go with it
Where The Streets Have No Name is a beautiful song in and of itself, but THIS version (the one you HAVE to watch after reading this) is by far the best and I’ll tell you why.
I was there to see this transition happen live. U2 played one of their older songs (“40″) which is Psalm 40 set to music. “How long, to sing this song?” is the question we’ve all asked from time to time. Not just David. Bono ends the song acapela, and the entire arena sings along. It really became one of the most powerful church services…EVER! Hands raised. Tears. Voices crying out, even if they didn’t really know who they were crying out to. “How long God? We’ve waited patiently…how long do we have to keep waiting? How long to sing this song?”
Then, those guitar notes. The Edge’s magnificent delay rings out and with tears, power, and most of all passion, Bono begins quoting scripture confessing that he hasn’t forgotten the promise he made to God all those years ago and confirms he’ll follow through on the promise he made to him.
As the song kicks in….joy overwhelms me. I remember it overflowing my heart…the only place it could escape was through my hands that were raised to the sky and the tears that streamed down my face.
It was truly one of the most powerful moments, and this video captures what it was like for me. Every time I watch it, I cry.
Tears of joy.
Following the song, there is a brief clip of Bono’s speech while accepting an award. Also moving.
